A Life Measured by Weather

It's really hurricane season again with the advent of the first official storm to hit South Florida for 2006. Oh Ernesto, be lenient with us!

Earlier today I was sitting at my desk reflecting upon a couple of things that all happened around this time last year.

First, ex-BF and I weathered our first (and last) storm together during Katrina. The experience precipitated our break-up. For most, Katrina will always conjure memories of devastation and destruction in New Orleans. For me, it will also be synonmous with disintegration of a relationship and sudden alienation of affection. Anyway you slice it, Katrina was a bitch.

I also started working at my job a year ago. To be sure, the bubble's off the wine. But I've learned a tremendous amount in the past year, not least of which is how to do a stellar imitation of my boss' death stare when my assistant walks in and asks me a imbecilic question.

Also around the same time was the birthday of one of my dear friends. Last year, we had a large group of friends together for dinner. This year I can' t make her birthday party so we just had a quiet lunch. It's comforting to know that in a year of change, our friendship has remained the same.

And onto the present ... the Easter guy still lingers in the picture, coming in and out of focus every few weeks or so. Today he sent me an e-mail asking why we weren't shacking up for the storm and I was shocked. Ex-BF and I couldn't handle a storm, so how could I be expected to handle it with someone I hardly know? When I expressed my opinion, and finally related some of my bewilderment, he didn't seem to be effected one way or the other. Which of course confused me even more. Status of the "relationship"? Still completely unclear.

I guess in Florida, weather frequently provides such major events that they function as markers for the lives of its residents. The preparation for the storm triggered an onslaught of memories stored away somewhere forgotten. The weather has provided a good time of reflection on the events of the past year, and a conclusion that for the most part, I'm better off now than I was a year ago. Let's hope I can say the same when next year's hurricane season kicks off.

Rollercoaster of Love

It's been a while since I've posted and I'm sure that if I do have any faithful readers, they are left in suspense. Whatever happened to that guy from Easter? Did Stinger fall in love? Run off and elope? Did he agree with BF that she talks too much and kill her in her sleep?

Of course, the answer is none of the above. Me, fall in love? Ha!

I've been on perhaps the lamest relationship rollercoaster I've ever experienced. Every week for the last three months I have flip-flopped on how I have felt about him, largely because he has behaved differently every week. Even the highs and lows have been half-assed. It's been confusing. At first I assumed we were dating. Then just sleeping together. Then we had an oddly deep e-mail conversation in which it sounded like he cared about me more than I initially thought. So I started to treat him like he cared about me as much as it sounded like and now he has backed off. Like seriously backed off. As in total radio silence since Saturday afternoon, when I called him and he blew me off.

Even the sex isn't hot anymore. And at the outset I did not foresee that EVER becoming a problem.

I was concerned about this on Monday. And by Tuesday when I still hadn't heard anything, I broke down and e-mailed him. He responded and I never replied. Since then I haven't particularly cared about the situation, but I want some closure. The problem is that I'm too ambivalent about the situation to end it. Maybe he's just doing the three month freak out and will disappear into thin air and I can forget all about him.

It's been brought to my attention by several friends that he is not what I want. I don't need to be the center of someone's universe, but I should hope that I would rank higher in importance than the gym.

So, whatever. Another one bites the dust. Onto the next.

Oblivious

I like to think that I'm a fairly observant person. But it's amazing what can happen when you're not paying attention.

Remember that Easter brunch I mentioned in passing a couple posts ago? (See "As Easter Sunday Ends"). There was a guy there I never met before, who went to the same college as I did, and who recently moved to Miami from the Northeast. I really didn't give him a passing thought except as a pleasant addition to the alumni crew. Then a week later, he sent me an e-mail inviting me to brunch.

Now this guy didn't see me in my best "trying to be cute" act. I was being pretty much my loud, raucous self, complaining about guys who dicked me over, issuing catty comments about mutual acquaintances, looking a little bitter, a little crazy, and a little funny. And he asked me out anyway.

We went to brunch and had a great time. So much that we wandered around afterwards, did some shopping, laughed more and then called it a day after three hours. He said he would e-mail the next day, and lo and behold, he did.

We went to dinner on Wednesday night and then to a bar. Continued to have a great time. We've been e-mailing all week and Thursday, before he went out of town for the weekend, told me he would call this weekend. I didn't believe him. But this morning, he called .

Everything he does says he likes me but I just can't believe it. My new baseline position is that boys can't be trusted, especially the ones who are nice from the start. They are going to turn into assholes sooner or later. Or, if they stay "too nice", I'll probably dump them.

I'm warily optimistic on this one. I'm not letting myself get too attached ... yet. But if he keeps up this whole nice and attentive thing, I'll drop my guard. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this doesn't turn out like everyone else. Your luck has to change at some point, right?