In a Town So Small, There's No Escape From You...

I've often mused on the Belle & Sebastian lyric that comprises the title of this post. It has meant different things to me at different points but has never ceased to be relevant, no matter where I have lived or to whom I have applied it. I know I have mentioned it in a previous post, but it is really just perfect.

In New York it applied to my college ex-boyfriend, whom I still encountered on an all-too-regular basis. Moving to Miami stopped that one dead in its tracks.

In my subsequent visits to Manhattan, turning around street corners in Nolita and the Lower East Side it reminds me of my charming Englishman.

Lately in Miami, it has applied to ex-BF, whom I see on the causeway and I-95 several times a week. Despite my best intentions to avoid him, there he is, in a line of cars attempting to exit at Miami Avenue, waiting in a line to get on the causeway ... he's just everywhere.

Last Friday night he called the friend I was out with to see what he was up to. We were at a bar across the street from his apartment building watching a baseball game. Ex-BF would not come over, pleading tiredness, but really I suspect that but for my presence, he might have sucked it up and walked across the street.

Last night, he was out with another set of friends when I called. But for his presence, I would have joined them.

He lives ten blocks away. His building is on my route to the grocery store, to the bank, to Lincoln Road. While this was once tremendously convenient, it is now nothing but painful. On one hand I do not want to change my life and my routines because of him -- it gives him way too much power in my mind. On the other hand, altering my behavior may be the easiest way to avoid him altogether and hence get over him.

The situation has recently become a little more dire than I first realized. I purchased a book called "It's Called a Break-Up Because It's Broken." The book is essentially a series of rules and pieces of advice to get over the guy who dumped you. I was skeptical at first, but willing to try anything. The book tries to empower the female dumpees of the world to stop sitting at home alone eating ice cream and get on with their lives. In my mind the most influential part of the book are letters from other girls in my situation -- dumped for no apparent reason, completely bewildered, and more than a little upset. It's a good reminder that I am not alone in this.

Last night I was looking for plans and could not find anyone willing to go out. Perhaps the message of the book -- to get on with my life -- gave me the strength of will to leave the house, alone, and go watch the baseball game at my favorite neighborhood bar, across the street from ex-BF's apartment.

I didn't even realize it until this morning, but when I exited the cab last night, I didn't even look to see if his car was there. I watched a couple innings alone until I realized two friends were randomly in the same bar.

This is a small town, to be sure. As the book would put it, the "best-worst" thing about it being a small town is that I can't escape ex-BF ... but it means I am bound to run into people I adore, when I least expect it.